For quite some time I have felt a sense of guilt about showing little interest in my parents’ farm lifestyle. As a teenager I longed to move to the city. At the time I did not realise that my parents and their chosen lifestyle shaped me and my opportunities, bringing my dreams into reality. I only came to this realisation this year when I experienced homesickness. Feeling home sick for the first time instilled a new appreciation for the stillness, safety and open space that the farm provides me. This took me by surprise as I had always wanted to leave home (the farm) behind.
The project is a documentation of unfamiliar spaces that remind me of home and evokes a sense of comfort. I see myself reflected in these spaces, their quiet and peace. While I do not know who occupies these spaces, to me they seem like calm spaces when I am in need of escaping the busyness of the city. The spaces on the farm are worn down, old and show traces of human activity over time. I seek spaces in Cape Town that serve as safe surrogates, visually and emotionally. Traces of human occupation often highlight the spaces I searched for in the city. Knowing that someone else was present in the spaces for their own purposes is a fascinating solace.
It occurred to me while photographing in the city that I never once felt a sense of safety. I drove around the Cape Town suburbs in search of familiarity but never found it. Visually these spaces bring initial comfort to me, draw me in, but I always end up feeling like an unwelcome visitor. It is not home.
